Midnight Light 2

Seeing the light gives me hope. Hope of returning. I already know that is not true. Standing up I walk over to the glow. I look into it and see my home. A home that I have only left for a few hours. In the pre dawn light of that world I see the gas station. All is as it should be. A car passes by and I look to the right following its course, but I can't see it anymore. Instead I am looking at a row of dilapidated buildings surrounded by old junk that litters this world. I quickly look back and the soft glow of red shines upon me. I want to crawl into the hole where this light comes from but, it is embedded in the tight framework of the crossing guard post. It is only big enough for a bird to squeeze through.

Another car approaches the light filling up the road. A light that seems unnaturally bright for this deserted world. The car turns, it is not a car but a truck. A white truck, it is my white pony. It turns across the tracks and I see myself staring at myself. The other world me just looks at me and sees a shadow, like I have done so many times before on my way to work. I see myself look away and then look back. The shock that I first saw on my own face is now gone replaced with a relaxed smirk. The other me is relaxed because he has moved away from the hole and can't see into this world anymore just like I couldn't see the car going down the street before. Looking at my home world I can see the trees are devoid of leaves. It is winter there. It is morning there. I remember that smirk, it was on my face the first time I saw the man in the tracks. That was two years ago. Things in this world show the appearance of late spring. It is past midnight here. Transfixed I keep staring. I stand there so ling that my eyes grow tired, my legs want a rest but my heart cannot let it go. I must return to my family.

Everything I see through the window is special to me. I memorize the gas station. Conneco is written it white light in the bright light of the red overhang. The signs in the windows, advertisements for bud light, camel cigarettes and posters for the NC state lottery tickets. The neon Camel blinks to life stating the price of a pack of smokes. Behind the ads the shadow of the items on the shelves stand up like a black skyline with the darkness of the interior of the store mimicking the night sky. I frantically scan the area looking for something that tells me the date trying to confirm what i thought of the smirk I gave in the truck. I cannot find anything not even something that will tell me the time. The sun is almost up over there when the window starts to grow smaller. I don't notice at first but seeing less of my home pains me once again. Soon I am only looking through a peephole. Staying fixed to my spot searching for something that might help me. Then just like turning off the light on the other side that peep hole it is gone and all that I see is dark. My eyes are watering and I blink hard several times just like when I am trying to wake myself from a dream. Everything goes out of focus. My legs cramp and I lay myself down. Wiping the water from my eyes my vision starts to return.

Laying down close to the tracks I stare into the sky. Lose asphalt and rocks scatter the ground below me. There aren't many weeds here. I schuffle around to ride my back of rocks and simply lie there and watch the stars , eventually falling asleep.

I dream. I dream I am at work walking the course. Following the cart path up a small hill I come to a small group of pine trees. I see the green and know that I am on number nine. I can see the top of the half way house on the other side of the road behind the green. A small family of deer come out of the woods and I stop. The deer look away and i can tell they are not afraid of much but there is something that makes them uneasy. I slowly side step and hide behind some trees. The deer run across the fairway and bound into the woods at the other side. I simply stay hidden in the trees and don't move. I awake.

The sun is out and warms me well. The asphalt is soaking up the sunshine and returns it to me warming my back helping remove the stiffness from sleeping on the rocks. Thirsty I find my water bottle at the truck and take a mighty gulp then stop myself thinking there might not be more around. It is starting to get warm and I am tired. I head over to the abandoned Cotton Square mall to find shelter.